Milwaukee Teacher Gives Family The Gift Of Time

Milwaukee teacher Penny Urben and Kathy enjoy their time together.

By Jackie Ceille

Providing respite for families with a child who has special needs has been a part of Penny Urben’s life for nearly 25 years. Since 1995, she’s been helping a family in the Milwaukee area. They have three children. The middle child, Kathy, is diagnosed with Pervasive Developmental Delay (PDD). PDD falls into the autism spectrum and presents social, speech and behavioral challenges.

Penny was introduced to this family through the Respite Care Program at Children’s Service Society of Wisconsin – Milwaukee Office.

“The parents needed a break from Kathy’s hyperactive behavior,” Urben said. “They were also concerned that she was becoming isolated because her exposure to the outside community was quite limited. Her parents told me they couldn’t do it alone – that they needed help raising Kathy.”

Urben is an early childhood special education teacher at Craig Montessori School, a “full inclusion” school in Milwaukee Public Schools. She’s also a part-time instructor at Milwaukee Area Technical College for the Early Childhood Associate Degree Program.

Urben looked at this volunteer experience as a way to help the parents avoid burnout, stress and fatigue, and to enhance their ability to cope. She also felt that as a teacher she could think of places to take Kathy that perhaps her parents may not be aware of or interested in.

“Sometimes my respite visits have included all of the children. A trip to the Milwaukee Art Museum, library, or a community event gives the parents time to have dinner together, to shop, or to do some fix-up jobs around the house.”
One typical outing a few years ago held a surprise for Penny.

“We were driving to the park and I began singing. Kathy soon joined in, and I discovered her wonderful singing voice. She has perfect pitch!”

Last year, Urben happened to meet Kathy’s high school teacher and asked if she’d heard her sing. Now Kathy is a member of “The Exceptional Chorus” at her high school.

Respite is a vital part of the support system for families who have a child with special needs. It is the service these families most often request. Yet, officials say, respite is in critically short supply in Wisconsin and throughout the U.S.
Parents raising a child with disabilities face many challenges. The divorce rate is 80%.

There are long waiting lists for the respite programs throughout Wisconsin. Respite providers do not need to have a special education background, just a willingness to support families and spend time with a child.

Children’s Service Society of Wisconsin is a private, not-for-profit, statewide child welfare agency. The Milwaukee and Wisconsin Rapids offices have respite programs. In Milwaukee, volunteers are matched with the specific needs of each child and family. Children being served are infant to age 18 years who have physical or emotional disabilities or developmental delays. Individualized care is provided evenings or weekends on an ongoing basis in the child’s or provider’s home, or on outings in the community. Volunteers are expected to give at least six hours of respite care each month at mutually agreed upon times. In Wisconsin Rapids, the program receives funding from the county, and respite providers are paid for their service.

The program provides much-needed assistance for families, but also carries rewards for the providers. Urben enjoys her relationship with the family.

“It’s been wonderful to see the children grow over the years, and the parents have expressed their gratitude many times,” she said.

For more information about how you can share a little of your time as a respite provider, contact Lynn Harmon at Children’s Service Society in Milwaukee: (414) 453-1400 or lynn.harmon@cssw.org. In Wisconsin Rapids, contact Tami Drew-Harris at (715)-421-0480 or tami.drew@cssw.org.

More information is available at the Children’s Service Society of Wisconsin Web site.

Posted September 30, 2003