By Lisa Dennis

Parent Teacher Conferences can be an intimidating experience for many new and future teachers as concerned parents who, with their son's or daughter’s best interest at heart, can sometimes put teachers on the defensive.

In some of the best case scenarios, parents come to hear you heap praise on their offspring, smiling and nodding as you relate anecdotes to affirm their student’s brilliance. Other conferences involve willing parents who seek guidance on how to better help you help their children. But other meetings and circumstances can be downright intimidating.

A few weeks ago, I experienced a conference night like never before. With three honors classes, one college preparatory class, and my first Advanced Placement class, I had a line of parents for three solid hours! While each conference was productive, the evening’s toll on my voice was certainly less than ideal for class the next day.

No matter your school’s organization for these meetings, preparation is the name of the game. Below are some suggestions to help ensure your conferences are a positive experience for all involved:

• Make sure you are fully prepared to speak with any and every parent. You most likely will not see everyone, which at the high school and middle school level will help save your sanity, but you must prepare yourself for any parent that might take a seat across from you. Bring your grade-book, student work samples, notes, or anything you could use to give parents a better understanding of their child’s experience and achievement in your classroom. One tool I have found effective is to have students evaluate themselves before their parents go to conferences. This evaluation can provide unique insight and give students a voice even if they aren’t able to attend the meeting.
• Greet parents professionally and politely in order to set the tone for the meeting. Letting parents know that you take your job and their presence seriously will create an atmosphere conducive to fruitful discussion. 
• Make sure to allow parents the opportunity to speak and ask questions. At the same time, be a good listener. While your input lets parents know what’s going on in the classroom, parents can be a vital voice in helping us see our students from a different perspective. 
• Use the opportunity to share your thoughts, but also as a means to establish a working relationship with parents. Ask for contact information that you can use to keep parents better informed and answer their questions as they arise throughout the year. 
• Don’t be afraid to ask for assistance if needed. Most often, school specialists and administrators are available to help ease tensions, should they arise, or provide additional information for parents. Nothing is worse during conferences than trying to defuse a potentially hostile meeting by yourself. Often, if parents are upset, it is due to miscommunication or lack of information. Stay calm, try to rationalize, and as I said, seek assistance if you need it. 
• Make sure to have something to drink or your throat will be screaming for relief! 
• Learn from the experience. Conferences can be an exhausting time, but the work you are doing can be hugely beneficial to the students you teach. Communication between parents, students, and teachers is often vital for success in the classroom. Take this opportunity to establish that link to better your students’ learning and your effectiveness during instruction. 
• If students accompany their parents to conferences, use their presence to benefit the conversation. Often students will be much more honest with themselves and their parents than you might think. 
• Have a plan in place to contact parents you need to speak with but don’t get a chance to see. Often the parents we want to speak with the most are the ones that don’t or can’t make it to conferences. Make it a priority to reach out to those parents whose students need you the most.